Loans

Loans like loving lovely losses.

Loans - Riding The Happy Hen

Cluck cluck! goes the hen! Mother quail, sister partridge, uncle Rooster - protect me from these dangerous loans! Use your spurs and bountiful plumage to fend off high rates and the cold sensation of debt! Ahhhhh! Its a nightmare of poultry death - bad credit loans, steel-taloned freaks. Cluck cluck goes the happy hen, content with the rescue of yet another loan survivor.

Happy loans are helium balloons

Loans - everyone needs them. From the lowliest worm to the mighty ape, we all need loans at some time or another. They help us drive, they make home ownership possible, and they free up cash for when we need it most. But what about theses cash loans, these payday advances that keep our motors humming despite the frigid financial air around us. Are they happy? Do these loans smile and go to heaven and find oceanfront plots of land - for free? No, these are the scorned loans, the financial tools everyone wants to forget about. Poor little loan - how ever did you lose your way?

Wayward loans in a hurtful world

Payday loans began as happy little helpers - a brief little pick me up for people to chew on in their anxious moments between one payday and the next, military loans to assist our gun-toting warriors in their eternal fight against peace and botherhood. And as long as they are used for only these critical moments everything is fine. So you pay an extra $30 - its not going to break your bank. What will break your bank - and what really puts the black eye to the payday loan industry - is the fact that charges don't stop with that first $30 - they keep growing, and growing and growing until the weight is so great that your personal finances collapse upon itself.

The great payday crunch

Take out too many personal loans and they will rise up against you. With revolving payments, continual late fees and an always gaping hole left after repayment its nearly impossible to avoid succumbing to the cash loan, and it will crush you in no time. Pretty soon it'll be loans for the very second you get your paycheck - because your paycheck will already be spent on unsecured loans past - what a horrific world! Dominated by an alien race, by computer chips and cash hungry strangers providing fast loans to us all! Oh, ohh! Its horrible! Oh my Go...oh god I think Im freaking out.